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JOSH WILSON-THAT WAS THEN
I have had an unbelievable year. I finally got my kids and I away from a 17year relationship w an abusive alcoholic with Gods strength. I was content w taking care of my kids and that was enough to keep me busy. My first love found me and contacted me. I got totally swept away and fell in love with him again. We planned to get married on April 7th. I found out that alot his promises were lies and postponed the wedding. Before i had a chance to figure out if what we had was real or just fantasy he killed himself. Now all I can do is wonder why God thought I needed to go through this. There is no answer i can think of. I am totally heartbroken and dont know how I can ever trust again or feel joy. I will because I have awesome children and I know God loves me but prayers for strength and understanding would be greatly appreciated.