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EMMANUEL (HALLOWED MANGER GROUND) BY CHRIS TOMLIN
I am a single Dad of one girl, since she was 8 months old, now 18. I am 51 years old. I miss the life that I had raising my daughter on my own, in our apartment and I also miss having a full-time job, so I could support her and I, in our apartment. It was so nice to be on my own, so I would not have to worry about problems with my mother, or about problems with my daughter and my mother. Everytime when there are problems it just makes me feel like it is all of my fault that I am the one to blame, because we are back to living with my mother. My mother is so lucky that she has a good job, with no layoff. She has worked the same job for 25 years with no layoff. I wish that I could have something like that. Me, I lost my jobs that I worked, then got laid off. I lost my job because of the recession, and I ended up on unemployment, but that came to an end. Now, I am having such a really hard time getting a job. I have my car, my mom pays for my insurance and most of the time she will fill up my tank. I wish that I could just have a good paying job, that I could do, and not have to worry, and be independent with my child. I have applied for so many jobs, but all of this time, since 2012, I have never been able to get a full-time job that is permanent, that will accept me for who I am.
I just wish that I could have a full-time job that I could do, due to my disability, and that pays good money.
When I lost my job, I tried my hardest to get on disability. I applied 4 times, and I still have a hard time getting it. People that I have talked to, told me that I qualify for it, but yet, I always get denied. I am so fustrated as to why my life is like this. Sometimes, I get depressed and I do not know what to do.